Latest English Jokes

Boy: Where Are You Going? Girl: For Suicide..
Boy: Then, Why Soo Much Make-Up?
Girl: You Idiot..!! Tomorrow My Photo will Come In Newspaper.

John: I got married because I was tired of cooking, cleaning home and washing clothes.
Paul: Amazing, I got divorce for the same reason.

Johnny: Dad, what is a weapon?
Father: Well, Son, that's something you fight with.
Johnny: Is Mom your weapon?

Man:Doctor ! My Son has swallowed a key.
Doctor: When ?
Man:Three Months Ago
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Man: We were using duplicate key

A girl & boy were sitting alone, that boy started touching de girl,
Girl : dont touch me, all this only after marriage.
Boy : ok call me when u r married.

After robbing the bank,  robber to clerk : Did you see me robbing?
Clerk : Yes I saw u.
Robber killed him and asked to the next clerk : Did u?
Second Clerk : No, but my wife saw u